Change Attitude, not Lifestyle Print E-mail

People believe that to turn spiritual you have to change your wardrobe, diet and lifestyle and adopt a sombre and boring pattern. This does not appeal to most who continue in their materialistic ways. A few inspired ones change everything except their thinking! They fail to benefit, get frustrated and give up. Rare is the wise one who focuses only on ‘attitude’. And succeeds!


You have a fundamental choice in every situation, at every moment. You can be unhappy and complain. Or you can be happy and cheerful. The choice is yours. It has nothing to do with the world or what it presents. You could have the best of things and be miserable, as is the case with many of us. You may have nothing and yet be deliriously happy, like Sudama who was a pauper but felt totally fulfilled. What makes the difference? Attitude.


In life, everyone is denied a few things. But all of us have been blessed with millions of gifts. If you focus on what you do not have, you will be unhappy. If you choose to zero in on the things you have, you are grateful for them and you develop an irresistible desire to share, contribute, and give. This makes you happy. Unfortunately, modern life has programmed you to give value only for the things you pay for. But the most precious things come for free, which you do not even consider! Hence you live life feeling deprived and deficient when, in fact, you are totally fulfilled and abundant.


While acting you can function with the attitude of taking or be suffused with the spirit of giving. The principle is – ‘Grab you Lose, Give you Gain.’ Physics endorses it. An object is red in colour because it reflects red. It gains what it gives and loses the other colours it takes. So shift your focus from ‘what can I gain’ to ‘how can I add value to others’ and success will be yours. Besides, all selfish people are unhappy. To the extent you turn unselfish you will be happy.


Do you have conflict with the people you love most? Do you blame the ‘other person’ for it? Think again. Maybe it has to do with your attitude. Do you have expectations of your family members? Do you make demands on your spouse and children? This is not love. It is attachment. Love tainted with selfishness is attachment. The truth is you really do not love them. You only love yourself. You claim to love because they happen to cater to you in some way – tangible or intangible. This causes conflict and untold suffering. In the end you lose them. Attachment is the single most important cause for breakdown in relationships. Physically hanging on to spouse and children does not make for meaningful relationships. You need to earn their love and respect. Shift your stance from ‘hanging on’ to ‘letting go’. From binding them to releasing them from your clutches. From focussing on your happiness to enabling their fulfilment. Accept them for what they are, not what they can do for you.


The world and all that it offers is temporary, fleeting, passing. Sell your soul to any aspect of the world and you are committed to sorrow. Understand the transient nature of the world while living in it and you will be happy. Transact with the world, enjoy it, but always remember that it will pass. Give it the right value, not the exaggerated value you have for it now. Begin the search for the permanent. The journey itself becomes thrilling. Then you will experience true happiness irrespective of what you have or do not have.


So change your attitude, not lifestyle. Your life will change from drudgery to revelry. From mediocrity to Excellence.