Irritation is in our mind and the expectations we have of people. Make a clear assessment of the husband, his good as well as bad points. All put together maybe he is not such a bad person. So you accept him. Then be prepared for the negative traits that irritate you. When they come up you are no longer irritated as you were prepared for it. This is in the short term. The permanent solution is to evolve spiritually so you are no longer dependent on the husband yet you have a wonderful relationship because you have unconditional love. This will take time but keep at it. Slowly your irritation will reduce and eventually go.